Down to Cuck: What You Need to Know About Cuckolding

You should read these tips from those who have experienced cuckolding if you want to experience the excitement of it. Then, you should return for more!

Recently, the topic of consensual non-monogamy (CNM) has been in the news a lot. It involves ideas such as:

Swinging.

Polyamory.

Open relationships.

Cucking.

You have undoubtedly heard of cuckolding if you watch porn or have used dating apps or Twitter. However, are you aware of its true nature? This is all the information you require.

What is Cuckolding?

A fetish and type of consensual non-monogamy, cuckolding (sometimes called troilism) occurs when one person (cuckold or cuck, for short) becomes aroused by their spouse having sex with another person (often called a bull, though some find the phrase demeaning).

Consider the situation as if there were only one sexually permissive partner in an open relationship. For the person whose spouse is having sex with other people, it may also involve a degree of humiliation or even subordination. Consider someone who can perform "better" in bed or who has a larger penis. The cuck, who likes to watch, hear, or fantasize about their spouse having sex with someone else, maybe in the room when it happens, but they can also participate by sending pictures, messages, or listening to the juicy details when they arrive home.

Chastity is a factor in many transformed relationships, even though the narrative surrounding cuckolding tends to favor cucknormative experiences (traditional stereotypes portray the cuck and bull as males, even though females can be cucks and are called "cuckqueans"). (Although many persons who like cuckolding dynamics do practice chastity, chastity does not lead to cuckolding.) A bull is someone who has sex with the cuck's partner but is not in a relationship. Couples of any role, gender, or sexual orientation can enjoy cuckolding.

Why Do People Like Cuckolding?

Compersion

One term used to describe consensual non-monogamy is "compersion." In essence, it means that whether or not we are having sex, we want everyone to respect one another and be happy. Fundamentally, it is the antithesis of jealousy. (And it is entirely possible to experience jealousy and compersion simultaneously.)

It's Considered Taboo

It can be shocking to depart from the cishet fairytale of monogamous bliss till "death do us part" in a society that views infidelity as a sin. The same is true of a dynamic that is only focused on a woman's erotic pleasure. Therefore, whether it occurs in real life or fantasy, cuckolding can be a turn-on for couples. Then, there is the aspect of being watched or being watched that some individuals find pretty attractive.

Power Dynamics

The submissive nature of cuckolding appeals to a lot of people. Some cucks enjoy assisting their partner in finding another companion. The humiliation that someone else can more effectively gratify their lover may even arouse them.

How Common is Cucking?

Contrary to popular belief, cuckolding fantasies are far more prevalent than you might imagine. Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D., a social psychologist and researcher at the Kinsey Institute, surveyed thousands of Americans for his book Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help Improve Your Sex Life. He found that approximately one-third of women and 58% of men had considered cuckolding.

For the past five years, Bert, a 55-year-old Brisbane, Australia resident, has been a cuckold. In a partnership, then in a marriage. "It's a kink I engineered into our relationship, with my wife's support," he says.

He was self-aware enough to understand that his fantasy about seeing his partner fuck another man was based on early memories of being cheated on. Still, the fantasy itself was always about being permitted to be a voyeur. "The dark side of my erotic life has always been the fear of being cheated on and the closely related fear of being sexually inadequate (it's very chicken or egg," Bert explains.

However, Bert later met the woman who would be his second wife. Compared to his past relationships, she was much more tolerant and a little younger than him. She was still seeing other people when we first started dating, and she was happy to tell me about her sex life, Bert said.

They both benefited from the dynamic. They saw no need to stop having fun when they chose to be married. At that moment, Bert came across the cuckolding fetish online and was instantly captivated by its power dynamics.

Being a willing cuckold, letting jealousy increase rather than decrease eroticism, having my partner's nonjudgmental encouragement and active enjoyment of my submission, and having my (self-alleged) inadequacy materially and emotionally acknowledged by wearing the chastity cock-cage are all huge energy charges for me and changed the game for us as a couple," he says.

How to Get Started

Addressing expectations, worries, and hopes beforehand is essential if you're considering taking a chance on a cuckolding scenario. More communication reduces the possibility of repercussions, whether it is by discussing birth control, disclosing STIs, or setting clear boundaries. You must first ensure that the primary relationship is stable. One of the most important—and frequently disregarded—rules in CNM is this one. According to Janet Pailet, a sex and intimacy coach and author of Living An Orgasmic Life: Heal Yourself and Awaken Your Pleasure, CNM stresses relationships, adds levels of complexity, and demands a great deal of trust.

At first, Bert and his spouse enjoyed some lighthearted cuckolding, but when they started a polyamorous triad with another man, things became dire. He claimed that they were my keyholders for a while. After the triad fell apart, the second man and Bert's wife are now together.

Where to find a third

The 50-year-old Californian Alex meets companions through websites and app connections. He didn't expressly look for a pair or match that was seeking a cuck dynamic. There has been a strong correlation between cuckolding and hotwifing in meeting couples. Despite their differences, the dynamics are comparable. In addition to being physically attracted to and having sexual chemistry with others, Alex also has to get along with his partners.

How to talk to your partner

In any situation, discussing sex can be pretty uncomfortable. (This is likely why it's a hot issue in online romance forums.) However, open and honest communication is essential to the success of any relationship. It depends on your partner, though, as Bert points out.

"Telling them they can definitely have that should be enough to start a conversation at least," he says, "if they're already open-minded enough to be honest about occasionally wanting a bit of variety in bed." The year is 2022. It should go without saying that women must have complete control over their bodies and the freedom to select who they want to share them with. Any form of coupledom does not and should never equate to ownership.

Instead, he claims that cuckolding is merely a kink that can be useful in allowing a committed couple to have that essential freedom, among other things.

Cuckholding Tips

Consent is key

In any sexual relationship, whether in a group or not, consent and respect are crucial. Avoid post-cuckolding regret by adhering to established limits, both emotional and physical.

Communicate, communicate, communicate.

Bert follows the no-secrets rule. Never, ever keep secrets. A radically honest discussion of emotions and sex. "It is important to acknowledge and talk about any feelings that may develop between your partner and her bull," he says. As odd as it may seem, love has the power to destroy a relationship, even yet cuckolding can only succeed in one that is truly loving.

The cuck must realize that they won't have total control and believe that their partner won't do actions that "endanger" their primary relationship, Alex continues. The one with sexual privileges must build their own identity and desire for the aspects of the relationship that they expressly desire, as well as reassure their cuck when necessary.

Don't skip the STI talk.

Talk about it before anyone gets nude. It's better to talk about safer sex in person, but you can also talk about it over the phone or by text. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that over a million new STIs are acquired every day. This indicates that 110 million Americans, or around one-third of the total population, are infected with an STI at any given moment. However, STIs are pretty prevalent and generally harmless. Knowing your standing is, therefore, a good idea.

Speak up if something feels off

.Communicate regularly, listen, and be open to criticism. Although these may not be deal-breakers, acknowledging challenging emotions could make the experience more enjoyable for everyone, whether jealous feelings surface or you decide you don't want to watch your spouse be raped in real life.

It's OK to stop at any time.

It's also OK to slow down, pause, or take a break if necessary. Although they are typically used for harsher sex and BDSM, safewords can also be helpful in cuckolding play.

Talk about it afterward.

I prefer to connect with my primary partner after sexual play to talk about what worked and what didn't and to get a sense of whether we want to do it again. It's hot AF to switch post-sex highlights.

Take away

Not everyone is a good fit for cuckolding. My experiences have varied from mediocre to astounding. Without signing up for an in-person event, the fantasy can occasionally be exciting enough. It's alright. Feeling secure, at ease, and content is crucial before engaging in any sexual activity. Being GGG (Good, Giving, and Game, an acronym coined by Dan Savage) and acting only to appease a partner are very different. Cuckolding should never be done under duress or out of guilt.